Educar en Positivo
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Module 2

Improve the relationships within your family

Being a parent is one of the most important tasks a person has to perform in her/his life. It is full of gratifying amazing moments, but occasionally it can also be very challenging. In all the different phases we establish a different relationship with our daughters and sons. They grow up and they change, but we, the parents also experience change. This relationship, however, never ceases to be special and unique.

In our busy lives it is not always easy to spot out an opportunity to grow together with our children. We have to look for moments to spend time with them, enjoy their company, share activities, hobbies… Shortly, we have to enjoy our tasks as parents and share the family life and space.

In getting closer to our children, however, there are bound to be problems that arise from everyday life, problems that appear on a daily basis. In any case, it is important that we use these problems and different points of view to get to know each other better and to make the relationship stronger. It is crucial for the family to develop sound communication skills. In this way we can always find a positive side in conflicts with our children, although they might look negative and complicated at first.

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Did you know...

  • There are many data gathered during various research in Spain that indicate a decrease in emotional attachment, expressions of feelings and time spent together by parents and children during adolescence. There also tends to appear a deterioration in communication, for in this growing phase, teenagers talk less spontaneously about their lives, there are more interruptions and therefore it gets harder to communicate with them.
  • These studies have shown that parents are especially worried because of conflicts linked to household chores, studying, going out in the evening and mood and personality swings of the teenagers, whereas their children are more bothered by comparisons between siblings, the fact that their parents do not pay enough attention to their lives and lack of money. These discrepancies tend to deepen the lack of understanding each other.
  • In general, mothers are more inclined to negotiate and to explain their point of view than fathers or teenagers; whereas the teenagers use more assertive strategies, negative emotions or they just ignore the conflict. This is one possible reason for the growing distance between parents and their children.
  • Parents feel the conflict as their failure that will remain in time and is out of their control. They feel frustrated and powerless when trying to solve them.

Objectives

1.
To think about the quality of the shared space and the communication with the children and to identify favourable or limiting methods for the communication.

2.
To foment the positive interpretation of the conflict as an opportunity to change the relationships and growth for the whole family.

3.
To think about the way parents feel about the conflicts and how to interpret the behaviour of their children, and to promote the change of perspective to better understand their points of view.

4.
To analyse different aspects of their children’s lives in which parents can intervene and to think about adequate methods in each of those aspects.

User's profile

There are no limits regarding selection of the participants to this module. It can be followed by every parent that wishes to improve the family coexistence, regardless of the level of conflict or problems the family is experiencing.